No This Is Not The Onion But I Will Provide A Little Hilarity Along The Way !

No This Is Not The Onion But I Will Provide A Little Hilarity Along The Way !

The daily grind continues for all of us and in the world of sports it appears to be no different , other than the idiocy of the sports journalists out there feeding us their blurb as to the plight of certain issues that are now arising . The prosecution has rested its case in the Barry Bonds’ perjury trial and the presiding judge , Judge Susan Illston has already stated that one specific charge will be dropped from the prosecution’s case . That being said this trial elicits about as much interest as the ongoing downfall of Hollywood actress Lindsay Lohan ! The sooner a verdict is reached in this case the better off all of us will be , because the monies spent over the course of this investigation and the trial itself could have been better spent dealing with a real issue with regard to the Justice System . Nothing shows idiocy more than when a <a href=””&gt; Federal Agency is allowed free rein to go out spend money at will , with </athere being any real oversight by the CBO (Congressional Budget Office) or nothing at all that’s tangible to seen at the end of the day . And to think that there’s a very real chance that we could see the Federal Government being shut down for the first time in fifteen years ? OK so there’s a remote chance that House Majority Leader John Boehner (R-Oh) and his counterpart in the Senate Sen. Harry Reid (D-Nv) may well avert a shutdown by agreeing upon a compromise as it relates to the funding of the government’s operations . We’ll no doubt know before the midnight deadline on Friday much to my dismay I’d genuinely like to the government come to a grinding halt ! This seated chamber of Congress has been about as productive over the legislative session as water being poured into a bucket whose bottom has multiple gaping holes in it !


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Slide show for your perusal .

So the Boston Red Sox has started off their season with an 0-5 mark in the AL East . Am I missing something here because I was under the impression that the season was a 162 game schedule ? Given the hyperbole of the comments now being made, one would have thought that the Red Sox’s season had already imploded . That being said the team has performed miserably with their being very little offense and the pitching has been downright mediocre at best . Terry Francona and his staff have to really look at where the real inhrent problems are , readily address them before things really get out of hand .

In the midst of this all the Baltimore Orioles have surprisingly leapt to the top of the AL East standings having swept the Tampa Bay Rays with ease . The two time AL East champions have if anything performed miserably and one shouldn’t at all be surprised given the upheaval within the roster from last season to the Rays’ present embodiment as a team . To suggest that the team has struggled would be an understatement and it certainly hasn’t helped that the team’s most high profiled player Evan Longoria is now on the disabled list . And with the team’s off season acquisitions Johnny Damon and Manny Ramirez struggling to make their presence felt it is becoming increasingly clear that the Rays will struggle to be viewed as a contender within the division much less over the course of the season .

As to the rest of the teams within the league it goes without saying that one can’t really put much into the first week of the season because from my own perspective the season doesn’t get into full swing until mid May early June and by then we’ll really see what sort of resolve and consistency there is to be seen from the teams within their respective divisions . This season is a long and arduous one and the contenders will undoubtedly separate themselves from the pretenders !

It goes without saying that the NFL lockout has now reached the stage where both sides will seek a legal recourse through the Federal Justice System . The NFLPA headed up by Executive Director DeMaurice Smith and union President Kevin Mawae have remained steadfast in sticking to their resolve of not budging from their original stance one iota. The concessions sought by the league team owners , league hierarchy headed by NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has been met with a resounding no by the players’ representatives and their union. And the league has now resorted to something of a propaganda war which on the face of it they seem to be losing . At the same time there have been formal statements from such prominent owners such as Jerry Jones , Jerry Richardson , Pat Bowlen , Steve Bisciotti , Robert Kraft , Wayne Weaver , Arthur Blank , Mike Brown and Randy Lerner , each of whom believe that there will be a season to had with football being played in 2011-12 . Given their optimism I’m not so sure as the two sides seem to be so far apart on what they view as being fair and equitable division of the spoils as it relates to the revenues that the league receives each season. When it comes to a situation where two sides simply cannot agree upon how best to divide $ 9 billion ($9,000,000,000 ) do you simply get the feeling that the world might be in fact coming to an end ?

With the advent of the upcoming NFL Draft which is set for the 22nd April , I think it highly unlikely that there will be football played at all. Both sides are disingenuous and at the same the belief that the league hierarchy feels there is something to be had by staging the draft does seem somewhat preposterous to say the very least. With the usual pomp and circumstance to be had the NFL stage the event with owners , coaches and general managers being present as well as a number of collegiate players who are thought to be first round picks in the upcoming draft. Personally , from my own perspective unless the NFL hopes that by ensuring the draft takes place it gives the fans the perception that the forthcoming season will take place , this will as such be an exercise in futility ! Having drafted a potential recruit , the player in question can’t be signed by that prospective team . As to the impression that creates for such players as Cam Newton , Blaine Gabbert , Marcel Dareus , A J Green , Patrick Peterson , Julio Jones and others thought to be prominent first or second draft round picks this whole spectacle could end up looking a clowns’ circus act , in terms of its viability.

And those players who’ll be represented by the likes of agents such as Tom Condon , Drew Rosenhaus , Leigh Steinberg , Eugene Parker and Mark Bartelstein who will do no doubt do their utmost to make sure that their clients will receive the highest visibility possible because of the ensuing lockout . And though several of these players have visited teams around the league for the cursory visit and informal interview , that is as much as any team or potential recruit can really hope for at this juncture .

The NFL Draft itself may well be filled with some intrigue but given the state of play or lack of it as concerns the NFL , I do believe that the fans’ overall interest in the event won’t be at all what the league or ABC/ESPN will be hoping for in terms of its coverage and a captive audience watching. If anything this could well be the season ill will , discontent amongst the league , its players and the fans in general . God knows the NFL and union has found more than enough ways of completely alienating the fans over the past few weeks with this lockout !

The NBA season is now winding down and the teams in the thick of things are looking to make one more bold move in order to secure a playoff berth for the postseason. Unfortunately those on the outside left looking in won’t be part of the postseason finale that usually brings a a great deal of excitement and controversy . I mean what’s the NBA postseason without any controversy to begin with ? Isn’t that akin to seeing Charlie Sheen now not being able to go without letting us know that ‘Tiger Blood’ and the term …..’ winning’ …. he believes will become iconic monikers that the whole world will in the end thank him for ? Personally , I’ve had enough of that talentless hack to last me at least two lifetimes ! His once affable show “Two And A Half Men ” had become stale sophomoric and about as funny as watching a child die needlessly from gun violence ! As to what that also says about the postseason within the NBA I’ll leave that to your imagination . Suffice to say that I’m expecting the officiating of these games to be about as impartial as the Supreme Courts’ decision with regard to the 2000 US Presidential election !

It now looks as if the teams are set with regard to the claimants of the seedings for the berths within the respective conferences . The San Antonio Spurs have won their division (Southwest) as well as having the best record within the conference (Western Conference) and in the NBA overall. At this juncture though it’d come as no surprise but I think it unlikely that Gregg Popovich will be high on the voters’ ballots for the NBA Coach of the Year Award ! That accolade I believe will be won by the Chicago Bulls’ —- Tom Thibodeaux because of the team’s unprecedented success this season and with the coach have made this team what I believe is an unlikely contender for the NBA title !

In the thick of this scenario within the Eastern Conference , it now looks as if the Boston Celtics , Miami Heat and Orlando Magic may well have a fight on their hands as to who will end up vying for to be the conference representative in this season’s NBA Finals . I seriously doubt that many of us would have looked at the Bulls as legitimate contenders for the title ! But the play of Derrick Rose this season has been exceptional and if anything it has placed him amongst the favorites for the League MVP Award . OK , all you LeBron James’ and Kobe Bryant admirers it’s time for you all to acknowledge that there might just be a ‘new Sherif in town’ . And that’d now suggest that we now have another elite player within our midst to go alongside LeBron , Dwyane Wade , Kobe and Kevin Durant .

The Western Conference itself has been somewhat topsy turvy with the Spurs for the greater part of the season having been the surprise team there. Albeit that the Dallas Mavericks have shown their usual regular season form with consistency and the usual play that one would come to expect from their perennial All Star Dirk Nowitzki . It remains to be seen whether not Nowitzki can lead this team back to another NBA Final and make a successful attempt at winning the game’s biggest prize. Their lopsided series’ loss in 2006 to the Miami Heat showed in fact that the sum of the parts was nowhere near the equal of the whole, with only Nowitzki showing any form of resistance from the onslaught of Dwyane Wade led Miami Heat during those finals . Needless to say it’ll be down to Nowitzki but in particular Rick Carlisle and his coaching staff to show us all that this team finally has what it takes , rather than being viewed as a ‘soft touch’ when real adversity stares them in the face .



Picture gallery for your perusal .

As a fan of either the MLB, NBA and NFL how do you view the remaining year in terms of the respective seasons for baseball and the NBA ? And what if anything do you hope to see as some form of a meaningful resolution between the NFL and the NFLPA (union) ? Merely leave a comment as to your thoughts on the matters raised within this piece .

Alan aka tophatal ……………………..

Picture and slide show details below .


(1) Former baseball player Barry Bonds waves as he leaves federal court in San Francisco, Thursday, April 7, 2011. Closing arguments in Bonds’ 12-day trial wrapped up Thursday afternoon and the eight-woman, four-man jury went home a few minutes later. AP Photo/Jeff Chiu ………….

(2) Former Major League Baseball player Barry Bonds greets a supporters as he leaves federal court at the end of the day on April 7, 2011 in San Francisco, California. Closing arguments have wrapped up in Bonds’ perjury trial as the jury prepares to deliberate. Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images North America ……

(3) Two simple reasons why Congress simply can’t do anything right ! Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nv) left and House Majority Leader John Boehner (R -Oh). If shit were brains these two would be at the top of the class ! Both congressional leaders can’t seem to reach an accord as to the funding of the governments’ operations and its budgetary needs for the fiscal year to end in September 2011. If there’s no accord reached with regard to an interim budget then the Federal government could shut down in part for only the third time in the last eighteen years . Getty Images North America / Chris Dowd …………….

(4) Boston Red Sox World Series and league championship banners hang of the Yawkey Way side of Fenway Park in Boston, Thursday, April 7, 2011. The Red Sox have started the season on the road with a 0-6 record ; their first home game is on Friday. AP Photo/ Charles Krupa …………….

(5) Shawn Butler, left, and Sam Cantor hold up brooms after the Cleveland Indians beat the Boston Red Sox 1-0 in a baseball game, Thursday, April 7, 2011, in Cleveland. The Indians swept the three game series with the Red Sox. AP Photo /Tony Dejak ……..

(6) Tony Sipp (46) of the Cleveland Indians pitches against the Boston Red Sox during the game on April 6, 2011 at Progressive Field in Cleveland, Ohio. Photo by Jared Wickerham/Getty Images …………

(7) David Ortiz (34) of the Boston Red Sox walks back to the dugout after grounding out against the Cleveland Indians during the game on April 6, 2011 at Progressive Field in Cleveland, Ohio. Photo by Jared Wickerham/Getty Images …….

(8) Tampa Bay Rays’ Reid Brignac watches his RBI single off Chicago White Sox starting pitcher Edwin Jackson, scoring Felipe Lopez, during the eighth inning of a baseball game and 5-1 loss to the White Sox, Thursday, April 7, 2011 in Chicago. AP Photo/Charles Rex Arbogast …………..

(9) A.J. Pierzynski (12) of the Chicago White Sox breaks his bat hitting the ball against the Tampa Bay Rays during the home opener at U.S. Cellular Field on April 7, 2011 in Chicago, Illinois. The White Sox defeated the Rays 5-1. (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images ………

(10) NFL attorney David Boies, center at microphone, addresses the media outside a federal courthouse after the NFL antitrust lockout hearing Wednesday, April 6, 2011, in St. Paul, Minn. A group of players is asking a judge to issue a preliminary injunction on the lockout the owners imposed after talks on a new collective bargaining agreement broke off three weeks ago. AP Photo/Jim Mone …….

(11) DeMaurice Smith, who was head of the NFL Players Association before it dissolved, talks to reporters outside the federal courthouse after a hearing Wednesday, April 6, 2011, in St. Paul, Minn. At right is players attorney Jim Quinn. A group of players is asking a judge to issue a preliminary injunction on the lockout the owners imposed after talks on a new collective bargaining agreement broke off three weeks ago. AP Photo /Jim Mone …..

(12) Derrick Rose (1) of the Chicago Bulls is called for a charge as he attempts to drive against Glen Davis (11) and Nenad Krstic (4) of the Boston Celtics at United Center on April 7, 2011 in Chicago, Illinois. The Bulls defeated the Celtics 97-81 . Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images ………..

(13) Carlos Boozer (5) of the Chicago Bulls moves against Kevin Garnett(5) of the Boston Celtics as Paul Pierce(34) moves in at United Center on April 7, 2011 in Chicago, Illinois. The Bulls defeated the Celtics 97-81. Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images …….



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Terence Blanchard ……………… “Sing Soweto ”


Bianca Holland

Eye candy …………….. Bianca Holland


10 thoughts on “No This Is Not The Onion But I Will Provide A Little Hilarity Along The Way !

  1. Bonds – Don’t care

    Red Sox 0-6 – HAHAHAHAHAHA!

    Rays – ugh, might be the wrong year to have david price on my fantasy team…

    NFL Lockout – Wake me when it’s over

    NBA Playoffs – Excited to get them going, enough of the regular season already!

    1. chappy81

      I’ve about as much empathy for Bonds as I’d have for my ex wife were I to find out that she’s now sleeping with the town drunk . ‘nough said !

      I can’t understand it these teams have the whole of Spring Training as such to get into a groove instead they’re continuing to stink up the joint like flies when they’re hovering around sh_t !

      The Rays and Red Sox had better get their s_it together before mid May or their respective seasons will be over before it’s even friggin’ well started .

      Ah …………. the NFL lockout that’s almost as exciting and entertaining as watching a political debate !

      I’m jacked up for the NBA Playoffs and I can’t wait to see how the Bulls will do and whether or not they’re for real . Who’d have guessed that they’d essentially end up as the #1 seeds in the Eastern Conference ? Not me that’s for sure as I was leaning towards the Celtics .

      In the West things are still a little murky and the fact of the matter is the Spurs are now playing a little too inconsistently for my liking .

      tophatal ………………

  2. The Rays are in a world of hurt, Al.

    Not only are they struggling to bring in fans again, this isn’t the start they wanted. Why will fans go out in hordes to see this team if they’re god-awful?

    Maddon better turn things around quick or the rest of this roster will become a fire sale by mid-season.

      1. JW

        Longoria would be the only player on this team I’d actually pay to watch ! Price is good , so too is B J Upton when he wants to be but more often than not he simply thinks that he can get by on talent alone rather than really applying himself.

        Come the trade deadline (July 31st) I can see Friedman getting rid of players especially if this team isn’t even in the hunt for the wildcard spot because that’s their best bet for getting into the postseason .

        tophatal …………….

    1. Chris Humpherys

      A world of hurt ? That’s an understatement as the Rays have more of a chance having sex with Joan Rivers or her daughter than they stand a chance of actually winning a game . I’m not saying that they’re bad as of yet but what the hell is Maddon and the staff doing ? All the tinkering about with the roster won’t change a thing if the guys have no real confidence whatsoever !

      Still think I’m over stating the possibility that they could be gone from this locale ? If they carry on playing like this they’ll be chased out of town rather than them moving of their own volition . They’re in for some lean times because no one is going to come to the Trop to see a piss poor team ………. and you obviously know that don’t you ? I’d like to hear Duemig’s comments on the Rays situation at present because as usual he tends to gloss over things with hyperbole and a great deal of crap .

      tophatal …………….

  3. With all the negative situations in sports today it is a real challenge not to get overwhelmed by the numerous problems in what is supposed to be entertainment. I feel the need to walk away for a while in order to catch my breath or at least until the Rays win a game:)
    Have a good one bro!

    1. aero

      You want negativity ? Look at those two bumbling assholes Boehner and Reid and how they’re botching things up with regard to coming to an agreement on the government’s fiscal budget . Those two make Laurel and Hardy seem like demons by comparison !

      You know what Harry you’re an asshole ! No John I think you’re an even bigger asshole .

      Stan Laurel & Oliver Hardy

      Given how poorly the Rays are now playing I’m not so sure what to make of their situation. If they can’t get it right during Spring Training ……… now isn’t the time to be experimenting especially within that division . If they’re still behind the 8 ball in mid June then their season will be essentially over .

      You and the family have a great weekend and do try and stay sober . I know how painful it has to be for you watching the Rays !

      tophatal …………….

  4. Chris Humpherys

    Ramirez is a fuc_king loser ! And the Rays are friggin’ oafs and retards for even thinking that he could offer anything to this team much less the organization . By the way how the hell can you be so naive to think in the first place he still had something to offer ?

    He stole money from the Dodgers last season he though he could do the same with the the Rays with his putrid output this season . Like I said Tampa is a second class city wanting to be amongst the big leagues much like the thought process of the fans in the locale .

    tophatal ………….


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